Julian Tavarez

The following is a poem to one of the weirder characters on the Red Sox that I thought of this morning while lying in bed. So without further ado, here is my ode to ol Leather Face.

Julian Tavarez

by Rain Delay

Sometimes he throws high,

Sometimes he throws low.

Sometimes he throws fast.

Sometimes he throws slow.

He is not the best.

And he is not the worst.

Of course none of that matters

Cause the Sawx are in first.

Jury Duty

Jury duty and jury service is often viewed as a giant inconvenience, pain in the ass, and waste of time by people, who are unfortunate enough to receive that little notification in the mail. I mean who really wants to sit there and listen to a bunch of lawyers yammer on about how important their case is, how seriously the parties take the matter, and how they need the jurors to resolve this dispute since the parties cannot do it on their own... (Read: Someone is holding back on the money to see how far they can push it before someone blinks and just settles the damn thing.)

And as someone that selects juries on a fairly regular basis, I would love to sell you on how important jurors are to the process, how the service is invaluable, blah blah blah... but truly, most trials settle and the likelihood of the lawyers ever needing the jury to make a decision is slim to none cause nobody wants to place the fate of their client's monetary future at the whim of six people who were dumb enough to not talk themselves off the jury in the first place. That's right folks, the only people who get selected to a jury are the ones who are just dumb enough to get picked or even worse, are the people who really want to serve on a jury i.e. crazy people, old people, and those individuals with full frontal lobotomy's. I mean shit this site about how to get out of jury duty was the first link that came up when I googled the phrase, "jury duty."

But with all of that being said, the last couple of trials have allowed me to realize the unintentional comedy or possibly genius intentional comedy that is being showcased by potential jurors on a daily basis. I mean in the last two weeks, I had two upstanding young gentlemen, who decided that in preparation for their jury service, they would wear the finest t-shirts in their respective bureaus with Gentleman # 1 wearing the I LOVE HOT MOMS t-shirt displayed below and Gentleman # 2 wearing a shirt that stated, "Your Name Must Be Summer Cause You Look So HOT!"

Accompanying his fine t-shirt, Gentleman #1 listed on the Juror Questionnaire that his hobbies including Drinking, Shoot Hoops, Dancing, and Tanning. While Gentleman #2 had decided that the t-shirt alone was not enough to fully portray his true style so he coupled this shirt with the old school pants sag with visible boxer short accompaniment. And as a final cherry on top of his overall image, Gentleman #1 informed myself and plaintiff's counsel that the female attorney representing a co-defendant selecting the jury with us needed to stop flirting with him during her questioning. (For the record, she had not said word one at the time he made this accusation.)

And while it may seem that I am knockin these guys, I really wanted to thank them for being candid about their thoughts on life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. I mean with outfits like those, there really was no need to dig any further to figure out what type of juror they could potentially be, how seriously they would take the process if selected, or whose boobs and ass they would be staring at the entire trial. And actually that made my job a hell of a lot easier when making decisions on who to select for the jury because as I stated, the only people who get picked are the people dumb enough not to get off. (read into that what you will.)

And since, I have nothing else to add to this topic and need to get home to take care of some shiz.. i will leave it at that.... and with the following words of advice:

If all else fails and it looks like you are going to get picked for a jury... just punch the person to your immediate right in the face as hard as you can... 60% of the time, it works everytime.

I Just Want To Celebrate...

Another day of livin!!!

Actually, I just want to celebrate the fact that I will be able to go on Roadtrip 2007, which is not something I could say with any confidence last Friday. Without boring you with the details, I found out a couple of weeks ago that I got the position at Six Flags to be Yosemite Sam for the summer. As a result, I am leaving my current job at the Blah Department and heading to the greener pastures of the private sector where I will get to learn new things and acquire a little more coinage than my current position. This all goes down on June 1st so since my current job does not like it when people move on, they are currently attempting to stick it to me anyway that they can, which was why last Friday, I could not settle the matter that I was trying. (mainly because my boss would not give me the money to make it all go away.) And since other shit in the case hit the fan last Friday, the schedule for the trial had worked out in a way that I would not have been able to get this coming Friday off. And so with a heavy heart, I prepared this weekend for battle... knowing that the Roadtrip 2007 would either be a 2 man job with Dirty D and Jingle or not go forward at all...

And then this AM, I bluffed the plaintiff's counsel into settling by basically throwing out the remainder of the money that I had authority for and then him countering with a number that was one hundred thousand dollars less than he previous demand and only twenty five thousand more than the number i offered. (read that sentence again slowly.. then smoke a joint... reread again....then read it backwards... and finally forget everything you just read) Point being, the case is over... and I am a free man...

So here is the plan as I see it for this year's roadtrip, we leave thursday night and then have two baseball games, one Friday and one Saturday... then its a long road home on Sunday... I plan on bringing the laptop and doing live updates from the road so check back early and often.. and I will try to update the Running Anger with as much content as I can...

Keep hope alive...

45 Year Old Virgin

Actually, it's really a 44 year old pitcher that the Yanks signed yesterday as Roger Clemens has once again come out of retirement (for the third time?) to rejoin the Yankees for the mere sum of 18 million pro-rated dollars. Of course for the Yankees, doling out the cash was a no brainer as they have been hit with injuries (Pavano, Mussina, Wang, Hughes, etc. etc.) and failure (Igawa, the middle relief core, and at times, old Fruit Bat himself, Mariano Rivera). So the Yanks did what they had to and outbid both the Red Sox and the Astros to get Clemens, who will turn 45 in August. Too bad, he has been limited to on average six innings of pitching the last couple of years, which means that the already overused, overextended, and overrated middle relief core should have their collective arms fall off by sometime right after the All-Star break in early July.

Of course, it wasn't just enough for the Yankees to sign baseball's most infamous mercenary, who has now jilted the Red Sox, the Blue Jays, the Yankees, and the Astros, instead the Yankees announced the signing in only the classiest and most tactful way that the most successful team in the history of baseball could by letting him hold his own press conference over the public address system during the seventh inning stretch of yesterday's game against the Mariners. That's right a team that prides themselves in being THE FRANCHISE OF CLASS in baseball decided that it was ok to make announcements about player signings by the player, himself, during an actual game.

What is this the WWE? I half expected Clemens to make his way from the owner's box down onto the field in order to hit the Seattle pitcher in the back with a steel chair with Steinbrenner then proceeding to drop an elbow on the fallen pitcher's limp corpse. Isn't such an announcement against the unwritten rules of baseball? And if so, why didn't the Mariners retaliate?

Thankfully even though the announcement was inappropriate, atleast the Yankees announcers i.e. Suzyn Waldman (the woman wearing the mask below),

reacted in a calm and professional manner or possibly, the announcers did the exact opposite apparently crapping, jizzing, and pissing themselves upon hearing the news. Words cannot even describe what exactly transpired on the air so I will just let you my readers listen to it here. While listening to it just remember these are professional announcers who are supposed to bring some level of (for a lack of a better word) professionalism to their broadcasts. Of course, these are the classy Yankees so it must just be part of the aura that is Yankees baseball that I will never understand as a lowly Red Sox fan.

And since yesterday was a giant momentum shift, it was nice to see that today, Joe Torre was suspended for one game, Scott Proctor was suspended for four games, and Igawa was sent to the minors.

Stay Classy San Diego!!!

A Preview

A couple of weeks from now, me and the gang are heading on our annual roadtrip. As some of you may remember, last year's extravaganza featured a little trip down south to the wonder of Virginia Beach, which featured a night out on the town, a day on the beach, and a lot of driving. (Oh and a quick stop at the B and L Falvey complex near DC.) This year we have switched our focus further South to the town of Greenville, South Carolina, home of the Single A affiliate of the Boston Red Sox. Clearly, I am a Red Sox fan so a trip to a place like that is not completely out of the realm of possibility, but this trip is even more likely since the Greenville Drive play in a ballpark that is a replica of Fenway Park. So since we cannot get into the real Fenway, why not drive 16 hours to the next best thing. In the end, it really is just a good excuse to go on a roadtrip with the boys... AND of course like last year, it will all be logged and posted here so consider this your two week notice. (And the beginning of my new shameless self promotion campaign.)

Nerf Dunks

Bill Simmons posted this on his blog, which can be found here. I can relate to this little jam session as back in the homestead in CT, I used to rock the slam dunk and three point nerf contests in my living room. Of course, I never did anything close to these dunks...

Enjoy.

Slam Dunk A Thon #1

Slam Dunk A Thon #2

Old News

Paris Hilton got sentenced yesterday to 45 days in jail, and with one unbelievably life changing moment, I now believe in the Jesus again. I mean this has to be the best news ever. How does someone that can afford a driver get:

A. Their license suspended; and then,

B. Oops, drives with a suspended license?

Honestly?

Obviously, I understand that Ms. Hilton is not exactly Ivy League but still doesn't she have handlers? I mean weren't they the background noise in her movie, One Night in Paris?

Anyway, I never supported the McCarthy Era Witch Hunts of the supposed commies in the US during the 40's and 50's (mainly cause I was not born), but I would whole heartedly support a roundup of all the meaningless worthless celebrities. I hope this is a jumping off point. Further, is there a petition I can sign? Or maybe, I will just ask you all to post to see if you support this movement... (I am going to be so disappointed when no one responds.)

Afternoon Television

Today, I am home from work as I had a callback interview this AM for my job at Six Flags. Things are looking good, and I should know if I am going to be either Tweetie Bird or Yosemite Sam for the summer on Monday. Anyway, since I am not at work, I have been spending my afternoon surfing the web, and watching afternoon television. And as you would expect there is NOTHING on during the afternoon, I mean even On Demand is not working properly.

As a result, I have been in an endless channel flip since about 1:30, which led me to stumble on the MSNBC covering live a low speed chase through the streets of East LA, and as I watched, I realized that this chase did not involve anyone famous nor had the drivers of the car done anything terrible i.e. shoot up a bank or a hit and run. Instead, this was simply a stolen car that the police were looking for.

And yet, even knowing that this chase posed no significance to the future of human existence I could not turn the stupid thing off wondering if the occupants of the car would shoot at police, hit a pedestrian, or suddenly, accelerate their car off the highway into the ravine, then, exploding into a fireball of death and destruction. Of course, none of this happened as the occupants of the stolen car eventually pulled over to the middle of road and gave up. But I remained glued to my set watching the entire surrender including the post arrest commentary.

So while I wanted to write a little entry here blasting MSNBC for covering this crap in the afternoon, I now realize to do so would be a level of hypocrisy that even I cannot stoop to... cause really the answer to why they show this crap is for people like me... who get sucked in and thus cannot switch the channel.

And since I got sucked in, the least I can do, is to provide you with some screen shots from the chase just so you can get the flavor of what went down... enjoy..

Here are the police, who according to the commentator are in a textbook perfect formation. Who knew there was a textbook for police formations? A training guide sure, but a textbook?

A close up of the textbook formation, not suprisingly, the cars that the California police officers use today have not changed in terms of their appearance since the days of Chips.

Oscar De Le Hoya...

Yankees Baseball

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

We Are Recover

Good to see that the Sox made a nice little bounce back tonight versus the Orioles, who have solidified their spot as the team to face when you are struggling in the AL East. Sure this is a team that once experienced record breaking crowds and some good seasons in the design changing park that is Camden Yards, but in their freefall as an organization over the last two decades, Baltimore have morphed themselves into the doormat of the American League... and yes, this is a tragedy, but then again, it also what happens when you predicate your success on a player like Cal Ripken who towards the end of his streak was nothing more than a cardboard cutout put out there to erase Lou Gehrig from the record books. When you bank on the past, you are going to have to pay for your loss of perspective on the future... So its good to see that the Sox with Schill found the way back to the win column, and hopefully, this will continue into this weekend's potential Bronx Bombers-sponsored revenge series at the Stadium.

Panic in the Bronx?

Last year, Theo Epstein pushed the panic button and made a trade to reacquire Doug Mirabelli from the Padres in order to bring back Tim Wakefield's personal catcher to the team. In doing so, he traded away Josh Bard and Cla Meredith, who proceeded to have rock solid seasons. After the way things ended up last year, Yankees fans constantly chided us Sox fans for having a GM who panicked and made an awful trade to bring back a backup catcher. And in hindsight, they are probably right... although there is NO WAY, anyone could have anticipated that Bard and Meredith would have the seasons they did.

So let's flash to today, with the Yankees currently in the middle of a five game losing streak after Mike Meyers gave up a grand slam to Carl Crawford in last night's game. Needless today on the FAN, fans and radio personalties alike are sounding the alarm and almost in unison seem to be chanting one thing, "BRING BACK BERNIE!!!"

No, this is not a cry to bring back that dead dude from Weekend at Bernies or that zany entertainment salesman from the Connecticut Home Entertainment stores. Instead, it is a cry to bring back Yankees old timer's day legend, Bernie Williams, who this year after year's of service with the club, was kindly told that his services were no longer needed and that in order to make the team, he would have to win a spot in Spring Training or spend some time in the minors. Not suprisingly, Mr. Williams took this as a giant shot at his pride and has not been heard from since the start of Spring Training. (Although the YES network was slobbering all over his nob on Opening Day, talking about how classy it was that Bernie called before the game to wish the team luck on the season. Hey guys, he's unemployed, he has NOTHING ELSE TO DO BUT MAKE PHONE CALLS AND DRINK!!!")

The point of this little rant is this... Bernie Williams CANNOT PITCH... and for anyone that has watched the last five games, pitching has pretty much been the problem here... They currently have A-Rod having the sickest April of any player in the history of baseball, but have coughed up any leads that his hot bat has provided them because their pitching SUCKS. So hey, bring back Bernie Williams, who at last check was atleast 103 years old, and just keep ignoring the fact that you have a total of 2 pitchers who can give you six quality innings each start. Atleast, your manager is not known for over pitching his bullpen during the course of the season. I am sure all those arms should be nice and fresh for the stretch run. Atleast if they do bring back Bernie, Red Sox fans will know the exact moment this season that the panic button was pressed.

Some General News

Not going to be much funny stuff written here but I figure that I need to even start putting the mundane down just so I can have an excuse to write. So here in no particular order and in true lawyer number'd fashion is my week that was:

1. Red Sox swept the Yanks in a meaningless series in April and for the first time in 17 years. Last year, when the Sox were swept by the MFY's at the end of the season, I was kind of glad because for most of the summer, I saw the cracks that were expanding within the Red Sox team. The team of '06 no matter how we want to spin was at best a transitional year team, who got lucky early and then ran out of gas at the end. So it was with great joy that the Red Sox actually beat the Yankees during the first series of this year. True, these Yankees were utilizing minor league pitchers, but you have to beat the teams that you are supposed to and this version of the Yankees are a beatable team. So it's a good start to build on unless they continue to get destroyed by the Blue Jays like they have the last two games.

2. New Job on the horizon? I interviewed a couple of weeks ago and from the sound of things, the firm should let me know in a day or two if I got the job. Not really going to say much more, but I would love to have a sweet ass new job. (And by firm, I mean Six Flags, and by new job, I mean dressing up like Yosemite Sam for a summer at their Park in New Jersey.)

3. New computer on the scene... Hooked myself up with a fat new ride, Dell Inspiron 1505 with 2 GB of RAM. The Mind of Rain Delay, who replaced the Mind of Mary (my old Apple) is supa fast and supa cool and I put a password on it so my roommate can't nuke it by looking at porn.

So that's what I got... nothing flashy just the way things are....

P.S. Brooklyn Lou is on vacation in Florida. At least is that what his postcard says...

Imus

I know that i am late to this witchunt, but after reading this article regarding a poll conducted to figure out what people thought of his firing, I needed to add my two cents. In the interest of full disclosure, I have listened to Don Imus since I was in elementary school because my parents were fans of his from the days of WNBC and through to his times on WFAN. I personally enjoyed the morning rants with politicians where he skillfully made them look like the dumb asses that they really are. I thought, however, in recent years, his show became too much about his ranch and whatever cause his wife was championing with less of a focus on him conducting kick ass interviews.

And yes, I thought that he often said things that were horribly offensive just like Howard Stern, Opie and Anthony, Rush Limbaugh, Bill O'Reilly, Nancy Grace, and anyone else that makes their living by trying to out shock the American public. But after his recent comments, I thought that Imus had gone to far, and I think that punishment fit the crime although I thought that doing it while he was conducting his annual telethon for Sudden Infant Death Syndrome and for his Ranch for kids with cancer, was pretty piss poor timing.

And finally, I would not even have bothered to write about it since I think that the media has done their usual tour de force shit storm of coverage leaving me with not much to add, but then i read this article. Now, nothing in the article actually surprises me except for the last sentence of this paragraph:

Among those Americans who had heard "a little" or "a lot" about the Imus story, 54 percent said the host's removal from the airwaves was about right. Thirty-two percent said it was too tough, and 8 percent said it was not tough enough, according to the survey by the Washington-based Pew Research Center for The People and The Press.

Now, the man got fired from his job and has been black balled for the time being from the airwaves. And yet, 8% of those people polled thought that the punishment was not "tough enough"? What exactly does that mean? What exactly would a person who answered the poll in that manner want to happen to Imus? A pound of flesh? A public stoning? Maybe we could just draw and quarter him... would that be enough for these people?

I mean I have no problem with him getting fired although I think it was less for the comments and more due to the collosal witchhunt that transpired, but I think the man has paid the price, apologized, and now, it's time to move on and start to worry about real like the price of cheese.

Lou? Lou? Where are You?

No he is not dead... but after two nights of virtually uninterrupted sleep, I think that the ultrasonic device that I bought has forced Brooklyn Lou to find other places to call home. (hopefully in my roommate's room.)

And it has been virtually uninterrupted as two nights ago, I got to hear a lovely drunk couple fight right out in front of my house at 4 AM... The conversation went something like this:

Drunken Girl: I am sorry, I cannot go fast I am really hurt from hitting my head on the pavement. I think i am really hurt.

Drunk Guy: What do you want me to do about it...

Dramatic Pause followed by the sound of Drunk Guy kicking the shit out of my plastic garbage can... (Not sure what the garbage can had to do with his dumb ass girlfriend falling and smacking her head, but I am thinking about filling the sucker with bricks in order to break the foot of the next mother fucker that kicks it.)

And then, silence, which leads me to believe that this drunk couple was then abducted by aliens and now reside on the planet, Zoon or possibly they just continued walking home...

Point of that matter is that Lou appears to be gone... I will be sure to let you know if he makes a comeback this weekend.

Update from the War

So way back when, I wrote about the ongoing battle that I have been having with my third roommate, Brooklyn Lou, a mouse who has setup his residence within the walls of my apartment. (Note: I am assuming it's one mouse when in reality, we are probably dealing with an entire fleet of mouse, rats, and several other of the mouse/rat family of rodents.) Recent cleaning revealed that Brooklyn Lou had been spending a lot of time in several places in my aparment like the corner of the kitchen, under the kitchen sink, and under the couch in the living room. AND by spending a lot of time, I mean that he was shitting like a crazy person in all three of those places. (Two points on that last sentence: Crazy people shit more than regular human beings and then smear their shit all over the place... it's science, don't argue with me about it....Further, per some interweb research, rodents shit so that they can figure out where they have been inside of a house or apartment the next time they go there... It's kind of like a fucked up version of Hanzel and Gretel.) So after some heavy duty cleaning along with the purchasing of several glue traps, my roommate (the human one) and I were confident that we had rid the abode of our friend, Lou.

Of course the story did not end there... because instead of Lou taking the hint that his presence was no longer wanted, he decided that since he was clearly not welcome in the kitchen or the living room that he would move into my room. So each night right around 3 AM, I get to hear my little furry friend participate in his version of Pants Off Dance Off while I attempt to catch the few ZZZZZZ's, I get each night. And while I understand that someday, I will hear the pitter patter of little feet in my own life, I am really not cool with my first experience in this realm being the sound of a friggin' mouse running wind sprints...

So after another night of constantly interrupted sleep, today, I decided to take matters into my own hands and went to the hardware store across from my work to stock up on a veritable arsenal of weapons to end the life of Sweet Lou. (Not Lou Pineilla, who by the looks of the Cubs season, is about two more outbursts from a major heart attack.) As such, I purchased 8 glue traps, 6 bags of poison, 1 enclosed trap, and finally, a nice little sound making device that is supposed to drive the mice completely nuts. As a result, tonight, I will methodically release all of my weapons on Brooklyn Lou and hope that I finally eradicate him from my apartment and the Earth. While I would love to say that I have confidence in this new approach, sadly, I think the more likely result is that Lou will take his battle for bedroom supremacy to my bed, and thus, I will wake up this evening to a close up shot of Lou's ass taking a mouse-size crap right on my forehead... At this point, I think I am just going to move to the couch and forget about the whole damn thing.

Here I am....

Well, alot has happened since the last time, I put finger to key and wrote for this little page. All I will say regarding that is that someone I care deeply for is going through a rough patch in terms of their health, but with prayer, support, and amazing strength, this person is going to be just fine. I, like this person, do not want to turn this blog into the type of thing that chronicles the ongoing battle that this person now faces... instead, I intend to keep the content light and the anger flowing... So other than the vague reference above that will be the last I talk about what i just wrote... You know the thing right up there that is vague... and contains no real detail.. No not that thing the other thing... exactly.

The Return of Brooklyn Lou

So tonight after finishing up the third Harry Potter movie and cleaning up after dinner, my evening was interrupted by the third member of my apartment, a mouse, who I named a long time ago, Brooklyn Lou. As background, I have seen a total of three mice since I arrived in Brooklyn almost three and half years ago along with approximately five cockroaches. I consider that number to be pretty decent by New York City standards so I continue to indulge them and our odd state of coexistence.

This evening's appearance occurred when Lou ran from behind the heater into the kitchen and then under the kitchen table. I promptly screamed saying the word "Mouse" with my voice cracking like a 13 year old boy going through puberty. I then gingerly got up, put on my Doc Martens, and grabbed the 2 X 4 located in my room. (As I said, its an odd relationship, one that someday may end with me bashing Lou's head in. Although I doubt, I have the guts.) Alas, Lou got away and is probably now somewhere downstairs feeding on the remnants of my landlord's daily cooked Italian feast.

Anyway, here's to Lou, you lucky little bastard, wherever you may be.. (most likely in my cupboard eating all my food and pooping everywhere.) (And yes, I am toasting him with a Blue Moon right now.)

Friday Night's Alright...

Sometimes I forget that Brooklyn is actually a huge borough and that it does not simply consist of Williamsburg and Brooklyn Heights, otherwise known as the area where I live and the area where I work. Anyway, last night, I went out to Bay Ridge to hang with some friends from work who call the Ridge their home. Bay Ridge for those you out there that do not know is the part of Brooklyn featured in Saturday Night Fever... and also a very neighborhoody part of Brooklyn which makes you forget that you are actually in one of the five boroughs.

Anyway, last night featured, a trip to a delicious little Middle Eastern place called, Tanoreen, which lived up to its reviews as one of the best Middle Eastern places in New York City. Plus, it's cheap, which is always an added bonus. The group did a number on the menu, eating hummus, baba, a cool little cauliflower dish, stuffed grape leaves, okra with lamb, shepherd's pie, turkish salad, and a delicious mixed grill meat platter. The place is BYOB, but there is a wine store and a bodega right next door to satisfy all of your drinking needs. The other cool part of the dinner was that the owner/chef of the joint was very visible during the entire dining experience walking around and talking to each table making sure that everyone was well fed and enjoying themselves. It was a nice little touch that I think is sometimes forgotten in the bustling restaurant industry of New York City. Safe to say, a good time was had by all.

After a filling meal, all involved decided that we were too full to continue the evening and thus I left Bay Ridge to head back to the Burg. As a nice little surprise ending to the evening, on my way back to the Burg last night, I got to ride on one of the new R160 subway cars that was being tested on the N line. The cars are similar in appearance to the R143 cars that can be found on L line along with others in New York City. However, this new car's features the high tech display screen seen below:

The display board has a LCD screen, seen above displaying the 8 Av Local C information. The screen changes as the train proceeds from stop to stop with advisories, information about the new cars, and advertisements for MTA and the services they provide. The screen can also change according to what line the train is on so no longer will F trains that are acting as G trains for the day be suffering from an identity crisis. Additionally, as seen to the right, the stops shift down the board as the subway cars travel from stop to stop and the board let's you know how many stops you are away from your destination. (Providing a little added torture to those hipster transplants living in Harlem, who are no reminded throughout their ride that they still have 30 stops left before they are home) Like the LCD screen, the list of stops will all change according to what line the train is traveling on. Finally, the announcements are all automated so there will no longer be the classic scratchy subway voice to decipher. (Actually, I prefer hearing the announcements from real people and then sharing a knowing glance with all of my fellow passengers who are equally confused by what was just said by the conductor.)

Anyway, it was kind of cool to get a little sneak preview of the future...and to see another part of Brooklyn... and while, I don't usually write these little look at me and all of my adventure style pieces, I beg your indulgence as I am quite sure someday I am going to need this little blog to help me remember what the heck I did when I was 29 and angry... so stop judging me.

Apparently Homes Were Not Enough

It seems that the vandalism back home is not just limited to home as now there is news that the school systems school buses were vandalized early this morning. Now, I am not sure if the house parties and this random vandalism is related or that its kids that did the vandalism, but someone nees to declare martial law back home and lock everyone in their homes. I mean I definitely came from a small town, but it was not so small that people needed to resort to destruction in order to find something to do to take their minds off of their pathetic existence. Maybe the town is just having a bad month or something or maybe everyone back home has gone crazy. Actually come to think of it, we do have a very poorly run nuclear power plant near our town so it is possible that everyone's genetics have been so altered by the leaking radiation that the town is now just populated by mutants who are bent on destroying all that exists there. Another possibility that just came to me while re-reading the article is that it is also possible that the town is now under the control of an angry gang of elementary school aged children, who will stop at nothing to ensure that they no longer have to go to school.

Anyway, here is some of the article from theday.com:

Twenty-two out of 25 buses used by the school district were vandalized sometime between 2:30 and 5 this morning, forcing the schools to close for the day.

The ignition wires and electrical wires to the buses’ lights and radios were cut, according to Jim Flahive, an area general manager for Laidlaw, the company that owns and operates the buses.

Here is the complete article.

My Hometown

Well since I am currently on trial in front of a judge, who may or may not have been a crazy person in his last life, and with minimal support from my own office, who collectively has decided this is the case to hang me out to dry on, I figured that I would post a quick little bit about the craziness that has occurred recently in my hometown in sleepy Connecticut.

The article below describes two separate parties back home where wild vandalism ensued as part of an apparently new phenomena where kids use the house of a vacationing friend/classmate and then trash the place. (Ok this is not a new phenomena, but I never remember needing to trash a place when I was partying there. Of course, I also remember being in the middle of the woods during the dead of winter, which in retrospect may have been a good indication of how much of a moron I was and am.) Anyway, it's wild times back home.... actually it's kind of sad... and pathetic...

From theday.com:

Police Investigating EL House Trashings

East Lyme — In Philipp Roosli's house, beer cans are toppled onto Legos. Bras are strewn on a bed near family photographs. Near the kitchen table, where a jug of Captain Morgan's Spiced Rum sits, the family has marked off its children's heights in pen on a door's molding.Boots and Tiger, the family's two cats, have their heights marked there as well. Tiger is missing.

Philipp Roosli and his family were in Europe last week on a ski vacation when, police say, dozens of teenagers entered their house as well as another in town and trashed both. East Lyme schools were off last week. On Monday, police were still piecing together how the teens got into each house and who caused the damage. Police said the Roosli house, on Riverview Road, sustained several thousand dollars' worth of damage. The other house, owned by the Balantic family, on Laurel Hill Drive, sustained about $20,000 worth of damage, according to police. In that incident, at least two teens also totaled the family car.

Three teenage boys have been charged in the Laurel Hill Drive incident. The arrest of a fourth who was injured in the car crash is expected. Police are unsure whether any of the four were also involved in the Riverview Road incident. Under a 2006 law, police are prohibited from releasing the name of any 16- or 17-year-old they arrest except in the case of serious crimes.

Police said they believe 20 to 40 people attended parties at each of the houses. They said they believe there were a total of about four parties on different nights. Police stressed that they are not looking to arrest everyone who attended the parties but are seeking those who might have broken in and those who caused damage.

The Rooslis' house was the perfect place for a party. Hidden from Riverview Road, it sits at the end of a long driveway. Woods separate it from neighbors. Roosli learned from a house-sitter Thursday that his house had been used for at least one party and that police had been there. Roosli decided not to cut his trip short and didn't come home until Sunday night. He and his oldest son, a freshman at East Lyme High School, walked in planning to do some cleaning. They quickly retreated. During a walk-through Monday, the floors were sticky in every room that isn't carpeted. There was vomit in the sink of an upstairs bathroom. In a downstairs bathroom, Roosli said human feces filled the toilet and a nearby litter box. In the living room, dozens of cans of Busch Light were stacked on a long wooden table that looks as though it was used for a drinking game. A pingpong ball lies underneath the table. Jugs of Captain Morgan were scattered throughout, and lollipops, wrapped and unwrapped, were discarded in nearly every room. In the basement, a cherished antique chair the family brought from Europe was destroyed, toppled backwards. Every bed in the house was rumpled, including the one is Roosli's daughter's bedroom, where a poster of the Lillie B. Haynes fourth-grade class of 2005 is pinned to the wall.

The rest of the article can be found here: http://theday.com/re.aspx?re=6f973343-be9d-4b2e-b26e-668f90054a33.