Trial and shizzle

So the last couple of days have been spent picking my first jury. It was a really interesting experience in that I basically spent two consecutive days in a room with complete strangers trying to figure out if they were the right fit for my case or if they were simply lying with the answers to my questions waiting to screw me once the trial started. It was an intensely mentally draining experience in that I essentially tried to read minds while looking interested at the same time. Plus, you cannot let them see you sweat as the saying goes... Is that even a saying... Anyway, after three days of trial, here are some highlights:

1. The 82 year old woman who sat their patiently in silence with no expression on her face until it was her turn to be questioned and then, when it her moment to shine...took us on a uniquely magical voyage involving her professional soccer player nephew, her job at a respected library, and the daughters that abandoned her (apparently) by moving to Colorado and getting married... But you know what, she was the most lucid person in the room at any point over the course of the two days.

2. The cranky old news editor who sat in the front row with a giant scowl the entire time he was in our presence.. or as my friend would say like the face a woman would make if she smelled a fart while she happened to be sucking on a lemon. Anyway, bitch pants sat there and judged the entire time until I asked him if he had any opinions about this great City of ours. His response, "I have many many opinions..." When I asked if he would like to discuss them outside, he informed me that it was his Constitutional Right to express them in the room. (I believe this falls under Amendment 9 or is that Article III) We topped this conversation off with a rousing game of All Lawyers Lie, which usually involves saying something about how all lawyers are liars. (the game stuck to form.)

3. Finally, today, before my case settled (ruining the ending), I had a conversation with the plaintiff's own son who informed me that he goes to the park by near my house where he practices karate and punches the concrete handball wall with different types of blows. He then asked me if I ever ran by the park in the morning, and if I knew what he meant by how he was punching the wall. Needless to say after the case settled, I ran from the court room hoping that he did not ask for my number or wait for me outside the office to follow me home. I will never run by the park again atleast not between the hours of 8 and 12 in the AM...

So that was that, the case settled, but I got to pick a real life no bull shit jury of 7 women and 1 man. Not sure how it would have all worked out if we had taken this thang the distance, but I am sure there will be more down the road. Atleast for now, I can relax, have a beer, get some sleep, and focus on running again.