Tuesday, October 16, 2007

RUMOR HAS IT

An emergency meeting of the Brotherhood of the Tallboy is being convened this evening in order to ensure that the Red Sox win tonight. The Brotherhood of the Tallboy was allegedly created in 2004 during the Red Sox run through the ALCS and then through the World Series.
Some would say that it was this Brotherhood alone that snapped the 86 years without a World Series title although that link has never been directly proven. While many of the Brotherhood's traditions and rituals are secretive, it is known that in order to be part of the Brotherhood of the Tallboy, a member must be sitting on a certain couch located at 398 Graham Avenue, Brooklyn, NY, eating sushi from a local bodega, and drinking Budweiser Tallboys.

While it is impossible to confirm, it appears that this is the first meeting of the Brotherhood since the spring of 2007 when purported member, Andrew Prior, was overheard pronouncing the season was over after an inning against the Orioles that featured JD Drew, Julio Lugo, and Coco Crisp, striking out in quick succession.

The Brotherhood's powers are strong ,and a force to be reckoned with.

Be afraid Indians fans… being very afraid.

Thursday, October 04, 2007

Joba's a fraud...

Straight from his own mouth, we learn that Joba Chamberlain, Yankees new wonder anus, stole his nickname from his cousin... Yeah that's right, his real name is Justin... And here is his explanation on how he got the nickname:

"Going back to the reservation when I was four, my cousin couldn't say my other cousin's name-- it was Joshua-- and she couldn't say it. It sounded like Joba (when she said it) and it stuck ever since."

Wait so let me get this straight, your cousin could not pronounce her own brother's name and thus she called HIM Joba... and yet now, they call you JOBA???? WAAAAAAAAA.....

Excuse me I have to go and map this one out....

Tuesday, October 02, 2007

Another Day in the Life of Isiah

In addition to tainting the legendary Knicks organization through his never ending spending, his questionable player moves, and his general lack of basketball management skills, Isiah Thomas was found liable today of sexual harassment. For those of you who have not followed this trial, Bill Simmons provides a pretty good recap here… And for those of you who want to know what level of intelligence, we are dealing with, with Isiah, I think the following quote pretty much sums it up, "I'm innocent, very innocent, and I did not do the things she has accused me in this courtroom of doing," Thomas said. "I'm extremely disappointed that the jury did not see the facts in this case. I will appeal this, and I remain confident in the man that I am and what I stand for and the family that I have." Hey Isiah, you’re innocent or you’re not… the use of “very” in this context is meaningless. It’s a black and white issue… And not a black versus white issue, like you tried to create in your deposition when you claimed it was appropriate for a black man to call a black woman a bitch but not appropriate for a white man to call a black woman a bitch… The difference here since you apparently need to have this sounded out for you is that my use of the phrase "black and white issue" in this context makes sense, whereas your little creation is rooted in racism, and is indicative of why the jury just found your ass liable.