RUMOR HAS IT

An emergency meeting of the Brotherhood of the Tallboy is being convened this evening in order to ensure that the Red Sox win tonight. The Brotherhood of the Tallboy was allegedly created in 2004 during the Red Sox run through the ALCS and then through the World Series.
Some would say that it was this Brotherhood alone that snapped the 86 years without a World Series title although that link has never been directly proven. While many of the Brotherhood's traditions and rituals are secretive, it is known that in order to be part of the Brotherhood of the Tallboy, a member must be sitting on a certain couch located at 398 Graham Avenue, Brooklyn, NY, eating sushi from a local bodega, and drinking Budweiser Tallboys.

While it is impossible to confirm, it appears that this is the first meeting of the Brotherhood since the spring of 2007 when purported member, Andrew Prior, was overheard pronouncing the season was over after an inning against the Orioles that featured JD Drew, Julio Lugo, and Coco Crisp, striking out in quick succession.

The Brotherhood's powers are strong ,and a force to be reckoned with.

Be afraid Indians fans… being very afraid.

Joba's a fraud...

Straight from his own mouth, we learn that Joba Chamberlain, Yankees new wonder anus, stole his nickname from his cousin... Yeah that's right, his real name is Justin... And here is his explanation on how he got the nickname:

"Going back to the reservation when I was four, my cousin couldn't say my other cousin's name-- it was Joshua-- and she couldn't say it. It sounded like Joba (when she said it) and it stuck ever since."

Wait so let me get this straight, your cousin could not pronounce her own brother's name and thus she called HIM Joba... and yet now, they call you JOBA???? WAAAAAAAAA.....

Excuse me I have to go and map this one out....

Another Day in the Life of Isiah

In addition to tainting the legendary Knicks organization through his never ending spending, his questionable player moves, and his general lack of basketball management skills, Isiah Thomas was found liable today of sexual harassment. For those of you who have not followed this trial, Bill Simmons provides a pretty good recap here… And for those of you who want to know what level of intelligence, we are dealing with, with Isiah, I think the following quote pretty much sums it up, "I'm innocent, very innocent, and I did not do the things she has accused me in this courtroom of doing," Thomas said. "I'm extremely disappointed that the jury did not see the facts in this case. I will appeal this, and I remain confident in the man that I am and what I stand for and the family that I have." Hey Isiah, you’re innocent or you’re not… the use of “very” in this context is meaningless. It’s a black and white issue… And not a black versus white issue, like you tried to create in your deposition when you claimed it was appropriate for a black man to call a black woman a bitch but not appropriate for a white man to call a black woman a bitch… The difference here since you apparently need to have this sounded out for you is that my use of the phrase "black and white issue" in this context makes sense, whereas your little creation is rooted in racism, and is indicative of why the jury just found your ass liable.

As an addendum

My flight got canceled.

Just as an update

I am currently listening to Senor Confidence singing a song that I hope he has entitled GO FUCK MYSELF, I HAVE A MUSTACHE and a dude, who just ordered a Caesar's salad cause he had two pizzas at lunch and who just informed his co-worker or lady or bitch on the side that the boat named after his mother was part of a whole fleet of boats that his family owned and named after each other.

BLOW ME!!

Confidence

So here I sit at an LGA bar (that's La Guardia and not the Lesbian, Gay Association from your college (Note: NO ONE FROM COLLEGE READS THIS)) on the way to Cleveland drinking a nice Sam Adam's Octoberfest (Rocktober fest if I am feeling feisty and queer)... Anyway, figured this was the appropriate forum to note Mr. Confidence who just sat down two bar stools from me.. Now Mr. Confidence is currently rocking a golf shirt, the glasses on the face, sunglasses on the head, and mustache presentation... As if to further endorse his current outward persona, he walked up to the bar whistling the theme to what might have been the Andy Griffith show, but probably was just his mashup/remix version of it... and then ordered some buffalo wings and an Amstel Light... I may ask him to marry me very soon...

Cheers till we write again.

Silence broken

Sometimes you need to go away for a little while and focus on other stuff before you can come back with vengeance. So I spent the summer on a sabbatical focusing on my job and my life. But now, as summer has ended, and the cool breeze of Fall is in the air, I find myself back and ready to go.

And as a bonus to my summer of focus, I was able to shed a mean 15 lbs of my fatness and get myself into some kind of shape to be able to do some of that running that is contained in this blog’s name.

So let’s begin again my friends… The Running Anger has returned!!!

Home is where my bed is

Yeah, we are home.. tired and beaten from 14 hour driving day that featured an hour long deadstop, car turned off traffic jam somewhere in Pennsylvania, we pulled into town around 11:15 PM. Great weekend as fun times were had by all. As for now, I am off to bed.. More with the daily journal posting and some final thoughts on the trip overall in the next couple of days...





Before that, here is one final picture of the park in downtown Greenville.





(Yeah it's pretty fancy.)

Costner

Day 2 in Greenville turned into the greatest night ever. Not only did we spend the day eating wings and drinking beers at Wild Wings, got to see the Drive win again, and AND IT'S A BIG AND got to see Kevin Costner and his band play. Even better, he dropped the F-bomb as soon as we got there, which if you ever come down South you will realize is kind of a big deal since no one seems to swear or curse or cuss or whatever it's fucken called. The Cos, as we started to refer to him as when we found out he was playing tonight also concluded his set by saying "Good Night" and then telling us all that he would "see us at the movies." Really Kev? Cause from what I recall your movies suck the life out of me along with my will to live. And just so you can all suffer along with me, here is the Cos and his band...

Greenville Drive WIN!!!

Even though the Big League Squad was rained out last night, the Sox still managed to gain a half game in the standings to now lead the Yankees by ten games. And while there was no baseball in Boston, the Greenville Drive put on an offensive barrage last night at West End Field winning with a final score of 12-5 or atleast that is what I remember the score to be. A good time was had by all as the Diz, Bob Jingle, and I consumed many beers and ballpark food in addition to getting to see victory by the hometown team. All of which was capped off with a little fireworks display to thank the fans..

The homage to the Green Monster at Fenway Park at the Greenville Drive's West End Field.

Not sure if they call this the Pesky Pole, but they should... nobody messes with Johny Pesky!!!

And finally , Gabe Kapler, the Hebrew Hammer and Drive Manager, exchanged his lineup card for that evening's game. Along with the lineup card, Kaler also gave his opposing manager some tips on body building and where to purchase the finest steroids in the local Greenville area.

Open Roads and Firework Heaven

Well, we have successfully rolled into town around 3:51 this afternoon. I am happy to report that the weather is beautiful, and it appears that we have dodged all the crappy weather in the Northeast currently. Not much to report as most of the actual events from the road will be covered in the official Roadtrip Diary that I will post when we get back to old sweet Brooklyn, but on our way to Greenville, we did find a very interesting fireworks facility. (Note: I think that "facility" is the only word that best encapsulate the size of that place.)

And as you can see, the Shelton Discount Fireworks Store is apparently, the "World's Largest Fireworks Store" where apparently you can buy any type of firework your little heart desires.

I mean seriously there are just aisles and aisles of short range explosives in this place..

With stacks and stacks of fireworks creeping up the walls along with bins and bins filled with ground fireworks like these fake grenades...

And finally for the younger crowd, this cute little Pink Elephant explosive... nothing says amazing display of fire and colors like a cute little pink elephant... And what a better way to start the kids down the road to future firework domination than with an appealing cartoon character.

Anyway, I guess even though alot of Americans especially in this neck of the woods are constantly touting the need to be vigilant against terrorism, we still find it just fine to house tons and tons of explosives that if combined might possibly create an even bigger explosive... I mean I understand the need to support the personal right to have firearms (i guess this what this firework obsession is derived from) but even this is a little excessive and just seems to provide too easy of access to potentially the wrong people i.e. drunken white males fresh off a day of moonshine and hillbilly heroine...

On that note... off to see the Greenville Drive.. GO SINGLE A BASEBALL!!!

One Stage Down

So thankfully, we pulled into Harrisonburg Virginia last night around 1:30 AM. As such, we are at the halfway to our destination as I sit here on the cardboard thin bed at the Super 8. Most of our travel has been smooth as it appears that we were able to avoid most of the traffic that we hit last year heading to Virginia Beach by heading further west on I-78 West to I-81 South. Unfortunately, we still have six hundred miles further south to drive. Fortunately, I don't drive so I can just sit in the back of Tina (the name of Volvo 2.0) and just take in the sights and sounds that are the dirty South. I wish I had more funny stuff to put down here but since I am mildly fighting off some crazy dehydration headache, I am going to leave you only with the bell that we rang after having excellent service at an Arby's in Pennsylvania. Of course, there was no service in the world that could save us when a half an hour after eating Arby's we all were wondering why the next rest area was sixty miles away. DING DONG!!!


More from Greenville, SC later today...

A Preamble to the Greatest Roadtrip of All Time

A long time ago, one of my friends was quoted as saying that he wanted to "start a movement." Of course, the flaw in that statement and underlying logic is that for the most part movements are not started instead they kind of just happen without people ever noticing that they are actually occurring until years later when historians label that thing that happened, "a movement." My point here is that I have essentially done the same thing by labeling the roadtrip that myself, Bob Jingle, Dirty Diz, ET, and the Faithful SteedVersion 2.0 are about to depart on as "The Greatest Roadtrip of All Time." (Last year's description of the cast of characters can be found here.) Most likely, this roadtrip won't be "The Greatest Roadtrip of All Time" and will be similar to most roadtrips that I have ever been with a grade around a solid B+. But maybe someday, historians will read the adventures that I write about here on this little page and one day determine that in fact our little sojourn to the land of Greenville, South Carolina was actually "The Greatest Roadtrip of All Time."

Until that time, the show starts at 6 PM this evening from 398 Graham Avenue... I will talk to you from the road...

Julian Tavarez

The following is a poem to one of the weirder characters on the Red Sox that I thought of this morning while lying in bed. So without further ado, here is my ode to ol Leather Face.

Julian Tavarez

by Rain Delay

Sometimes he throws high,

Sometimes he throws low.

Sometimes he throws fast.

Sometimes he throws slow.

He is not the best.

And he is not the worst.

Of course none of that matters

Cause the Sawx are in first.

Jury Duty

Jury duty and jury service is often viewed as a giant inconvenience, pain in the ass, and waste of time by people, who are unfortunate enough to receive that little notification in the mail. I mean who really wants to sit there and listen to a bunch of lawyers yammer on about how important their case is, how seriously the parties take the matter, and how they need the jurors to resolve this dispute since the parties cannot do it on their own... (Read: Someone is holding back on the money to see how far they can push it before someone blinks and just settles the damn thing.)

And as someone that selects juries on a fairly regular basis, I would love to sell you on how important jurors are to the process, how the service is invaluable, blah blah blah... but truly, most trials settle and the likelihood of the lawyers ever needing the jury to make a decision is slim to none cause nobody wants to place the fate of their client's monetary future at the whim of six people who were dumb enough to not talk themselves off the jury in the first place. That's right folks, the only people who get selected to a jury are the ones who are just dumb enough to get picked or even worse, are the people who really want to serve on a jury i.e. crazy people, old people, and those individuals with full frontal lobotomy's. I mean shit this site about how to get out of jury duty was the first link that came up when I googled the phrase, "jury duty."

But with all of that being said, the last couple of trials have allowed me to realize the unintentional comedy or possibly genius intentional comedy that is being showcased by potential jurors on a daily basis. I mean in the last two weeks, I had two upstanding young gentlemen, who decided that in preparation for their jury service, they would wear the finest t-shirts in their respective bureaus with Gentleman # 1 wearing the I LOVE HOT MOMS t-shirt displayed below and Gentleman # 2 wearing a shirt that stated, "Your Name Must Be Summer Cause You Look So HOT!"

Accompanying his fine t-shirt, Gentleman #1 listed on the Juror Questionnaire that his hobbies including Drinking, Shoot Hoops, Dancing, and Tanning. While Gentleman #2 had decided that the t-shirt alone was not enough to fully portray his true style so he coupled this shirt with the old school pants sag with visible boxer short accompaniment. And as a final cherry on top of his overall image, Gentleman #1 informed myself and plaintiff's counsel that the female attorney representing a co-defendant selecting the jury with us needed to stop flirting with him during her questioning. (For the record, she had not said word one at the time he made this accusation.)

And while it may seem that I am knockin these guys, I really wanted to thank them for being candid about their thoughts on life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. I mean with outfits like those, there really was no need to dig any further to figure out what type of juror they could potentially be, how seriously they would take the process if selected, or whose boobs and ass they would be staring at the entire trial. And actually that made my job a hell of a lot easier when making decisions on who to select for the jury because as I stated, the only people who get picked are the people dumb enough not to get off. (read into that what you will.)

And since, I have nothing else to add to this topic and need to get home to take care of some shiz.. i will leave it at that.... and with the following words of advice:

If all else fails and it looks like you are going to get picked for a jury... just punch the person to your immediate right in the face as hard as you can... 60% of the time, it works everytime.

I Just Want To Celebrate...

Another day of livin!!!

Actually, I just want to celebrate the fact that I will be able to go on Roadtrip 2007, which is not something I could say with any confidence last Friday. Without boring you with the details, I found out a couple of weeks ago that I got the position at Six Flags to be Yosemite Sam for the summer. As a result, I am leaving my current job at the Blah Department and heading to the greener pastures of the private sector where I will get to learn new things and acquire a little more coinage than my current position. This all goes down on June 1st so since my current job does not like it when people move on, they are currently attempting to stick it to me anyway that they can, which was why last Friday, I could not settle the matter that I was trying. (mainly because my boss would not give me the money to make it all go away.) And since other shit in the case hit the fan last Friday, the schedule for the trial had worked out in a way that I would not have been able to get this coming Friday off. And so with a heavy heart, I prepared this weekend for battle... knowing that the Roadtrip 2007 would either be a 2 man job with Dirty D and Jingle or not go forward at all...

And then this AM, I bluffed the plaintiff's counsel into settling by basically throwing out the remainder of the money that I had authority for and then him countering with a number that was one hundred thousand dollars less than he previous demand and only twenty five thousand more than the number i offered. (read that sentence again slowly.. then smoke a joint... reread again....then read it backwards... and finally forget everything you just read) Point being, the case is over... and I am a free man...

So here is the plan as I see it for this year's roadtrip, we leave thursday night and then have two baseball games, one Friday and one Saturday... then its a long road home on Sunday... I plan on bringing the laptop and doing live updates from the road so check back early and often.. and I will try to update the Running Anger with as much content as I can...

Keep hope alive...

45 Year Old Virgin

Actually, it's really a 44 year old pitcher that the Yanks signed yesterday as Roger Clemens has once again come out of retirement (for the third time?) to rejoin the Yankees for the mere sum of 18 million pro-rated dollars. Of course for the Yankees, doling out the cash was a no brainer as they have been hit with injuries (Pavano, Mussina, Wang, Hughes, etc. etc.) and failure (Igawa, the middle relief core, and at times, old Fruit Bat himself, Mariano Rivera). So the Yanks did what they had to and outbid both the Red Sox and the Astros to get Clemens, who will turn 45 in August. Too bad, he has been limited to on average six innings of pitching the last couple of years, which means that the already overused, overextended, and overrated middle relief core should have their collective arms fall off by sometime right after the All-Star break in early July.

Of course, it wasn't just enough for the Yankees to sign baseball's most infamous mercenary, who has now jilted the Red Sox, the Blue Jays, the Yankees, and the Astros, instead the Yankees announced the signing in only the classiest and most tactful way that the most successful team in the history of baseball could by letting him hold his own press conference over the public address system during the seventh inning stretch of yesterday's game against the Mariners. That's right a team that prides themselves in being THE FRANCHISE OF CLASS in baseball decided that it was ok to make announcements about player signings by the player, himself, during an actual game.

What is this the WWE? I half expected Clemens to make his way from the owner's box down onto the field in order to hit the Seattle pitcher in the back with a steel chair with Steinbrenner then proceeding to drop an elbow on the fallen pitcher's limp corpse. Isn't such an announcement against the unwritten rules of baseball? And if so, why didn't the Mariners retaliate?

Thankfully even though the announcement was inappropriate, atleast the Yankees announcers i.e. Suzyn Waldman (the woman wearing the mask below),

reacted in a calm and professional manner or possibly, the announcers did the exact opposite apparently crapping, jizzing, and pissing themselves upon hearing the news. Words cannot even describe what exactly transpired on the air so I will just let you my readers listen to it here. While listening to it just remember these are professional announcers who are supposed to bring some level of (for a lack of a better word) professionalism to their broadcasts. Of course, these are the classy Yankees so it must just be part of the aura that is Yankees baseball that I will never understand as a lowly Red Sox fan.

And since yesterday was a giant momentum shift, it was nice to see that today, Joe Torre was suspended for one game, Scott Proctor was suspended for four games, and Igawa was sent to the minors.

Stay Classy San Diego!!!

A Preview

A couple of weeks from now, me and the gang are heading on our annual roadtrip. As some of you may remember, last year's extravaganza featured a little trip down south to the wonder of Virginia Beach, which featured a night out on the town, a day on the beach, and a lot of driving. (Oh and a quick stop at the B and L Falvey complex near DC.) This year we have switched our focus further South to the town of Greenville, South Carolina, home of the Single A affiliate of the Boston Red Sox. Clearly, I am a Red Sox fan so a trip to a place like that is not completely out of the realm of possibility, but this trip is even more likely since the Greenville Drive play in a ballpark that is a replica of Fenway Park. So since we cannot get into the real Fenway, why not drive 16 hours to the next best thing. In the end, it really is just a good excuse to go on a roadtrip with the boys... AND of course like last year, it will all be logged and posted here so consider this your two week notice. (And the beginning of my new shameless self promotion campaign.)

Nerf Dunks

Bill Simmons posted this on his blog, which can be found here. I can relate to this little jam session as back in the homestead in CT, I used to rock the slam dunk and three point nerf contests in my living room. Of course, I never did anything close to these dunks...

Enjoy.

Slam Dunk A Thon #1

Slam Dunk A Thon #2

Old News

Paris Hilton got sentenced yesterday to 45 days in jail, and with one unbelievably life changing moment, I now believe in the Jesus again. I mean this has to be the best news ever. How does someone that can afford a driver get:

A. Their license suspended; and then,

B. Oops, drives with a suspended license?

Honestly?

Obviously, I understand that Ms. Hilton is not exactly Ivy League but still doesn't she have handlers? I mean weren't they the background noise in her movie, One Night in Paris?

Anyway, I never supported the McCarthy Era Witch Hunts of the supposed commies in the US during the 40's and 50's (mainly cause I was not born), but I would whole heartedly support a roundup of all the meaningless worthless celebrities. I hope this is a jumping off point. Further, is there a petition I can sign? Or maybe, I will just ask you all to post to see if you support this movement... (I am going to be so disappointed when no one responds.)

Afternoon Television

Today, I am home from work as I had a callback interview this AM for my job at Six Flags. Things are looking good, and I should know if I am going to be either Tweetie Bird or Yosemite Sam for the summer on Monday. Anyway, since I am not at work, I have been spending my afternoon surfing the web, and watching afternoon television. And as you would expect there is NOTHING on during the afternoon, I mean even On Demand is not working properly.

As a result, I have been in an endless channel flip since about 1:30, which led me to stumble on the MSNBC covering live a low speed chase through the streets of East LA, and as I watched, I realized that this chase did not involve anyone famous nor had the drivers of the car done anything terrible i.e. shoot up a bank or a hit and run. Instead, this was simply a stolen car that the police were looking for.

And yet, even knowing that this chase posed no significance to the future of human existence I could not turn the stupid thing off wondering if the occupants of the car would shoot at police, hit a pedestrian, or suddenly, accelerate their car off the highway into the ravine, then, exploding into a fireball of death and destruction. Of course, none of this happened as the occupants of the stolen car eventually pulled over to the middle of road and gave up. But I remained glued to my set watching the entire surrender including the post arrest commentary.

So while I wanted to write a little entry here blasting MSNBC for covering this crap in the afternoon, I now realize to do so would be a level of hypocrisy that even I cannot stoop to... cause really the answer to why they show this crap is for people like me... who get sucked in and thus cannot switch the channel.

And since I got sucked in, the least I can do, is to provide you with some screen shots from the chase just so you can get the flavor of what went down... enjoy..

Here are the police, who according to the commentator are in a textbook perfect formation. Who knew there was a textbook for police formations? A training guide sure, but a textbook?

A close up of the textbook formation, not suprisingly, the cars that the California police officers use today have not changed in terms of their appearance since the days of Chips.

Oscar De Le Hoya...

Yankees Baseball

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We Are Recover

Good to see that the Sox made a nice little bounce back tonight versus the Orioles, who have solidified their spot as the team to face when you are struggling in the AL East. Sure this is a team that once experienced record breaking crowds and some good seasons in the design changing park that is Camden Yards, but in their freefall as an organization over the last two decades, Baltimore have morphed themselves into the doormat of the American League... and yes, this is a tragedy, but then again, it also what happens when you predicate your success on a player like Cal Ripken who towards the end of his streak was nothing more than a cardboard cutout put out there to erase Lou Gehrig from the record books. When you bank on the past, you are going to have to pay for your loss of perspective on the future... So its good to see that the Sox with Schill found the way back to the win column, and hopefully, this will continue into this weekend's potential Bronx Bombers-sponsored revenge series at the Stadium.

Panic in the Bronx?

Last year, Theo Epstein pushed the panic button and made a trade to reacquire Doug Mirabelli from the Padres in order to bring back Tim Wakefield's personal catcher to the team. In doing so, he traded away Josh Bard and Cla Meredith, who proceeded to have rock solid seasons. After the way things ended up last year, Yankees fans constantly chided us Sox fans for having a GM who panicked and made an awful trade to bring back a backup catcher. And in hindsight, they are probably right... although there is NO WAY, anyone could have anticipated that Bard and Meredith would have the seasons they did.

So let's flash to today, with the Yankees currently in the middle of a five game losing streak after Mike Meyers gave up a grand slam to Carl Crawford in last night's game. Needless today on the FAN, fans and radio personalties alike are sounding the alarm and almost in unison seem to be chanting one thing, "BRING BACK BERNIE!!!"

No, this is not a cry to bring back that dead dude from Weekend at Bernies or that zany entertainment salesman from the Connecticut Home Entertainment stores. Instead, it is a cry to bring back Yankees old timer's day legend, Bernie Williams, who this year after year's of service with the club, was kindly told that his services were no longer needed and that in order to make the team, he would have to win a spot in Spring Training or spend some time in the minors. Not suprisingly, Mr. Williams took this as a giant shot at his pride and has not been heard from since the start of Spring Training. (Although the YES network was slobbering all over his nob on Opening Day, talking about how classy it was that Bernie called before the game to wish the team luck on the season. Hey guys, he's unemployed, he has NOTHING ELSE TO DO BUT MAKE PHONE CALLS AND DRINK!!!")

The point of this little rant is this... Bernie Williams CANNOT PITCH... and for anyone that has watched the last five games, pitching has pretty much been the problem here... They currently have A-Rod having the sickest April of any player in the history of baseball, but have coughed up any leads that his hot bat has provided them because their pitching SUCKS. So hey, bring back Bernie Williams, who at last check was atleast 103 years old, and just keep ignoring the fact that you have a total of 2 pitchers who can give you six quality innings each start. Atleast, your manager is not known for over pitching his bullpen during the course of the season. I am sure all those arms should be nice and fresh for the stretch run. Atleast if they do bring back Bernie, Red Sox fans will know the exact moment this season that the panic button was pressed.

Some General News

Not going to be much funny stuff written here but I figure that I need to even start putting the mundane down just so I can have an excuse to write. So here in no particular order and in true lawyer number'd fashion is my week that was:

1. Red Sox swept the Yanks in a meaningless series in April and for the first time in 17 years. Last year, when the Sox were swept by the MFY's at the end of the season, I was kind of glad because for most of the summer, I saw the cracks that were expanding within the Red Sox team. The team of '06 no matter how we want to spin was at best a transitional year team, who got lucky early and then ran out of gas at the end. So it was with great joy that the Red Sox actually beat the Yankees during the first series of this year. True, these Yankees were utilizing minor league pitchers, but you have to beat the teams that you are supposed to and this version of the Yankees are a beatable team. So it's a good start to build on unless they continue to get destroyed by the Blue Jays like they have the last two games.

2. New Job on the horizon? I interviewed a couple of weeks ago and from the sound of things, the firm should let me know in a day or two if I got the job. Not really going to say much more, but I would love to have a sweet ass new job. (And by firm, I mean Six Flags, and by new job, I mean dressing up like Yosemite Sam for a summer at their Park in New Jersey.)

3. New computer on the scene... Hooked myself up with a fat new ride, Dell Inspiron 1505 with 2 GB of RAM. The Mind of Rain Delay, who replaced the Mind of Mary (my old Apple) is supa fast and supa cool and I put a password on it so my roommate can't nuke it by looking at porn.

So that's what I got... nothing flashy just the way things are....

P.S. Brooklyn Lou is on vacation in Florida. At least is that what his postcard says...

Imus

I know that i am late to this witchunt, but after reading this article regarding a poll conducted to figure out what people thought of his firing, I needed to add my two cents. In the interest of full disclosure, I have listened to Don Imus since I was in elementary school because my parents were fans of his from the days of WNBC and through to his times on WFAN. I personally enjoyed the morning rants with politicians where he skillfully made them look like the dumb asses that they really are. I thought, however, in recent years, his show became too much about his ranch and whatever cause his wife was championing with less of a focus on him conducting kick ass interviews.

And yes, I thought that he often said things that were horribly offensive just like Howard Stern, Opie and Anthony, Rush Limbaugh, Bill O'Reilly, Nancy Grace, and anyone else that makes their living by trying to out shock the American public. But after his recent comments, I thought that Imus had gone to far, and I think that punishment fit the crime although I thought that doing it while he was conducting his annual telethon for Sudden Infant Death Syndrome and for his Ranch for kids with cancer, was pretty piss poor timing.

And finally, I would not even have bothered to write about it since I think that the media has done their usual tour de force shit storm of coverage leaving me with not much to add, but then i read this article. Now, nothing in the article actually surprises me except for the last sentence of this paragraph:

Among those Americans who had heard "a little" or "a lot" about the Imus story, 54 percent said the host's removal from the airwaves was about right. Thirty-two percent said it was too tough, and 8 percent said it was not tough enough, according to the survey by the Washington-based Pew Research Center for The People and The Press.

Now, the man got fired from his job and has been black balled for the time being from the airwaves. And yet, 8% of those people polled thought that the punishment was not "tough enough"? What exactly does that mean? What exactly would a person who answered the poll in that manner want to happen to Imus? A pound of flesh? A public stoning? Maybe we could just draw and quarter him... would that be enough for these people?

I mean I have no problem with him getting fired although I think it was less for the comments and more due to the collosal witchhunt that transpired, but I think the man has paid the price, apologized, and now, it's time to move on and start to worry about real like the price of cheese.

Lou? Lou? Where are You?

No he is not dead... but after two nights of virtually uninterrupted sleep, I think that the ultrasonic device that I bought has forced Brooklyn Lou to find other places to call home. (hopefully in my roommate's room.)

And it has been virtually uninterrupted as two nights ago, I got to hear a lovely drunk couple fight right out in front of my house at 4 AM... The conversation went something like this:

Drunken Girl: I am sorry, I cannot go fast I am really hurt from hitting my head on the pavement. I think i am really hurt.

Drunk Guy: What do you want me to do about it...

Dramatic Pause followed by the sound of Drunk Guy kicking the shit out of my plastic garbage can... (Not sure what the garbage can had to do with his dumb ass girlfriend falling and smacking her head, but I am thinking about filling the sucker with bricks in order to break the foot of the next mother fucker that kicks it.)

And then, silence, which leads me to believe that this drunk couple was then abducted by aliens and now reside on the planet, Zoon or possibly they just continued walking home...

Point of that matter is that Lou appears to be gone... I will be sure to let you know if he makes a comeback this weekend.

Update from the War

So way back when, I wrote about the ongoing battle that I have been having with my third roommate, Brooklyn Lou, a mouse who has setup his residence within the walls of my apartment. (Note: I am assuming it's one mouse when in reality, we are probably dealing with an entire fleet of mouse, rats, and several other of the mouse/rat family of rodents.) Recent cleaning revealed that Brooklyn Lou had been spending a lot of time in several places in my aparment like the corner of the kitchen, under the kitchen sink, and under the couch in the living room. AND by spending a lot of time, I mean that he was shitting like a crazy person in all three of those places. (Two points on that last sentence: Crazy people shit more than regular human beings and then smear their shit all over the place... it's science, don't argue with me about it....Further, per some interweb research, rodents shit so that they can figure out where they have been inside of a house or apartment the next time they go there... It's kind of like a fucked up version of Hanzel and Gretel.) So after some heavy duty cleaning along with the purchasing of several glue traps, my roommate (the human one) and I were confident that we had rid the abode of our friend, Lou.

Of course the story did not end there... because instead of Lou taking the hint that his presence was no longer wanted, he decided that since he was clearly not welcome in the kitchen or the living room that he would move into my room. So each night right around 3 AM, I get to hear my little furry friend participate in his version of Pants Off Dance Off while I attempt to catch the few ZZZZZZ's, I get each night. And while I understand that someday, I will hear the pitter patter of little feet in my own life, I am really not cool with my first experience in this realm being the sound of a friggin' mouse running wind sprints...

So after another night of constantly interrupted sleep, today, I decided to take matters into my own hands and went to the hardware store across from my work to stock up on a veritable arsenal of weapons to end the life of Sweet Lou. (Not Lou Pineilla, who by the looks of the Cubs season, is about two more outbursts from a major heart attack.) As such, I purchased 8 glue traps, 6 bags of poison, 1 enclosed trap, and finally, a nice little sound making device that is supposed to drive the mice completely nuts. As a result, tonight, I will methodically release all of my weapons on Brooklyn Lou and hope that I finally eradicate him from my apartment and the Earth. While I would love to say that I have confidence in this new approach, sadly, I think the more likely result is that Lou will take his battle for bedroom supremacy to my bed, and thus, I will wake up this evening to a close up shot of Lou's ass taking a mouse-size crap right on my forehead... At this point, I think I am just going to move to the couch and forget about the whole damn thing.

Here I am....

Well, alot has happened since the last time, I put finger to key and wrote for this little page. All I will say regarding that is that someone I care deeply for is going through a rough patch in terms of their health, but with prayer, support, and amazing strength, this person is going to be just fine. I, like this person, do not want to turn this blog into the type of thing that chronicles the ongoing battle that this person now faces... instead, I intend to keep the content light and the anger flowing... So other than the vague reference above that will be the last I talk about what i just wrote... You know the thing right up there that is vague... and contains no real detail.. No not that thing the other thing... exactly.

The Return of Brooklyn Lou

So tonight after finishing up the third Harry Potter movie and cleaning up after dinner, my evening was interrupted by the third member of my apartment, a mouse, who I named a long time ago, Brooklyn Lou. As background, I have seen a total of three mice since I arrived in Brooklyn almost three and half years ago along with approximately five cockroaches. I consider that number to be pretty decent by New York City standards so I continue to indulge them and our odd state of coexistence.

This evening's appearance occurred when Lou ran from behind the heater into the kitchen and then under the kitchen table. I promptly screamed saying the word "Mouse" with my voice cracking like a 13 year old boy going through puberty. I then gingerly got up, put on my Doc Martens, and grabbed the 2 X 4 located in my room. (As I said, its an odd relationship, one that someday may end with me bashing Lou's head in. Although I doubt, I have the guts.) Alas, Lou got away and is probably now somewhere downstairs feeding on the remnants of my landlord's daily cooked Italian feast.

Anyway, here's to Lou, you lucky little bastard, wherever you may be.. (most likely in my cupboard eating all my food and pooping everywhere.) (And yes, I am toasting him with a Blue Moon right now.)

Friday Night's Alright...

Sometimes I forget that Brooklyn is actually a huge borough and that it does not simply consist of Williamsburg and Brooklyn Heights, otherwise known as the area where I live and the area where I work. Anyway, last night, I went out to Bay Ridge to hang with some friends from work who call the Ridge their home. Bay Ridge for those you out there that do not know is the part of Brooklyn featured in Saturday Night Fever... and also a very neighborhoody part of Brooklyn which makes you forget that you are actually in one of the five boroughs.

Anyway, last night featured, a trip to a delicious little Middle Eastern place called, Tanoreen, which lived up to its reviews as one of the best Middle Eastern places in New York City. Plus, it's cheap, which is always an added bonus. The group did a number on the menu, eating hummus, baba, a cool little cauliflower dish, stuffed grape leaves, okra with lamb, shepherd's pie, turkish salad, and a delicious mixed grill meat platter. The place is BYOB, but there is a wine store and a bodega right next door to satisfy all of your drinking needs. The other cool part of the dinner was that the owner/chef of the joint was very visible during the entire dining experience walking around and talking to each table making sure that everyone was well fed and enjoying themselves. It was a nice little touch that I think is sometimes forgotten in the bustling restaurant industry of New York City. Safe to say, a good time was had by all.

After a filling meal, all involved decided that we were too full to continue the evening and thus I left Bay Ridge to head back to the Burg. As a nice little surprise ending to the evening, on my way back to the Burg last night, I got to ride on one of the new R160 subway cars that was being tested on the N line. The cars are similar in appearance to the R143 cars that can be found on L line along with others in New York City. However, this new car's features the high tech display screen seen below:

The display board has a LCD screen, seen above displaying the 8 Av Local C information. The screen changes as the train proceeds from stop to stop with advisories, information about the new cars, and advertisements for MTA and the services they provide. The screen can also change according to what line the train is on so no longer will F trains that are acting as G trains for the day be suffering from an identity crisis. Additionally, as seen to the right, the stops shift down the board as the subway cars travel from stop to stop and the board let's you know how many stops you are away from your destination. (Providing a little added torture to those hipster transplants living in Harlem, who are no reminded throughout their ride that they still have 30 stops left before they are home) Like the LCD screen, the list of stops will all change according to what line the train is traveling on. Finally, the announcements are all automated so there will no longer be the classic scratchy subway voice to decipher. (Actually, I prefer hearing the announcements from real people and then sharing a knowing glance with all of my fellow passengers who are equally confused by what was just said by the conductor.)

Anyway, it was kind of cool to get a little sneak preview of the future...and to see another part of Brooklyn... and while, I don't usually write these little look at me and all of my adventure style pieces, I beg your indulgence as I am quite sure someday I am going to need this little blog to help me remember what the heck I did when I was 29 and angry... so stop judging me.

Apparently Homes Were Not Enough

It seems that the vandalism back home is not just limited to home as now there is news that the school systems school buses were vandalized early this morning. Now, I am not sure if the house parties and this random vandalism is related or that its kids that did the vandalism, but someone nees to declare martial law back home and lock everyone in their homes. I mean I definitely came from a small town, but it was not so small that people needed to resort to destruction in order to find something to do to take their minds off of their pathetic existence. Maybe the town is just having a bad month or something or maybe everyone back home has gone crazy. Actually come to think of it, we do have a very poorly run nuclear power plant near our town so it is possible that everyone's genetics have been so altered by the leaking radiation that the town is now just populated by mutants who are bent on destroying all that exists there. Another possibility that just came to me while re-reading the article is that it is also possible that the town is now under the control of an angry gang of elementary school aged children, who will stop at nothing to ensure that they no longer have to go to school.

Anyway, here is some of the article from theday.com:

Twenty-two out of 25 buses used by the school district were vandalized sometime between 2:30 and 5 this morning, forcing the schools to close for the day.

The ignition wires and electrical wires to the buses’ lights and radios were cut, according to Jim Flahive, an area general manager for Laidlaw, the company that owns and operates the buses.

Here is the complete article.

My Hometown

Well since I am currently on trial in front of a judge, who may or may not have been a crazy person in his last life, and with minimal support from my own office, who collectively has decided this is the case to hang me out to dry on, I figured that I would post a quick little bit about the craziness that has occurred recently in my hometown in sleepy Connecticut.

The article below describes two separate parties back home where wild vandalism ensued as part of an apparently new phenomena where kids use the house of a vacationing friend/classmate and then trash the place. (Ok this is not a new phenomena, but I never remember needing to trash a place when I was partying there. Of course, I also remember being in the middle of the woods during the dead of winter, which in retrospect may have been a good indication of how much of a moron I was and am.) Anyway, it's wild times back home.... actually it's kind of sad... and pathetic...

From theday.com:

Police Investigating EL House Trashings

East Lyme — In Philipp Roosli's house, beer cans are toppled onto Legos. Bras are strewn on a bed near family photographs. Near the kitchen table, where a jug of Captain Morgan's Spiced Rum sits, the family has marked off its children's heights in pen on a door's molding.Boots and Tiger, the family's two cats, have their heights marked there as well. Tiger is missing.

Philipp Roosli and his family were in Europe last week on a ski vacation when, police say, dozens of teenagers entered their house as well as another in town and trashed both. East Lyme schools were off last week. On Monday, police were still piecing together how the teens got into each house and who caused the damage. Police said the Roosli house, on Riverview Road, sustained several thousand dollars' worth of damage. The other house, owned by the Balantic family, on Laurel Hill Drive, sustained about $20,000 worth of damage, according to police. In that incident, at least two teens also totaled the family car.

Three teenage boys have been charged in the Laurel Hill Drive incident. The arrest of a fourth who was injured in the car crash is expected. Police are unsure whether any of the four were also involved in the Riverview Road incident. Under a 2006 law, police are prohibited from releasing the name of any 16- or 17-year-old they arrest except in the case of serious crimes.

Police said they believe 20 to 40 people attended parties at each of the houses. They said they believe there were a total of about four parties on different nights. Police stressed that they are not looking to arrest everyone who attended the parties but are seeking those who might have broken in and those who caused damage.

The Rooslis' house was the perfect place for a party. Hidden from Riverview Road, it sits at the end of a long driveway. Woods separate it from neighbors. Roosli learned from a house-sitter Thursday that his house had been used for at least one party and that police had been there. Roosli decided not to cut his trip short and didn't come home until Sunday night. He and his oldest son, a freshman at East Lyme High School, walked in planning to do some cleaning. They quickly retreated. During a walk-through Monday, the floors were sticky in every room that isn't carpeted. There was vomit in the sink of an upstairs bathroom. In a downstairs bathroom, Roosli said human feces filled the toilet and a nearby litter box. In the living room, dozens of cans of Busch Light were stacked on a long wooden table that looks as though it was used for a drinking game. A pingpong ball lies underneath the table. Jugs of Captain Morgan were scattered throughout, and lollipops, wrapped and unwrapped, were discarded in nearly every room. In the basement, a cherished antique chair the family brought from Europe was destroyed, toppled backwards. Every bed in the house was rumpled, including the one is Roosli's daughter's bedroom, where a poster of the Lillie B. Haynes fourth-grade class of 2005 is pinned to the wall.

The rest of the article can be found here: http://theday.com/re.aspx?re=6f973343-be9d-4b2e-b26e-668f90054a33.

Rest in Peace: Dennis Johnson

No this is not a funny celebrity death pool post, but rather a sad little entry on the passing of Dennis Johnson, a former Celtics player and part of my favorite sports team of all time. The 1986 Celtics won the NBA Championship beating the Houston Rockets. I remember watching this series and the final game with my Dad. In fact, we probably still have the final game on tape somewhere in my house. Anyway, DJ as he was called was a huge part of this great team, and I will forever remember how he along with Danny Ainge handled the guard duties for that famous team. Sad times definitely.

Here is more from Espn.com:

Former Boston Celtics guard Dennis Johnson, coach of the Celtics' team in the NBA Development League, collapsed during practice Thursday and died, ESPN The Magazine's Ric Bucher is reporting. Johnson was 52. Johnson was the MVP of the 1979 NBA Finals, averaging 22.6 points as his Seattle SuperSonics beat the Washington Bullets. After a brief stint with the Phoenix Suns, Johnson rejoined the Boston Celtics, where he teamed with Larry Bird, Kevin McHale, Danny Ainge and Robert Parish for a glorious run in the 1980s that saw Boston win the 1984 and 1986 NBA championships. Known throughout the league as "DJ," Johnson played in five NBA All-Star games and was named to the All-Defensive First Team six times. In 14 NBA seasons, he scored 15,535 points (a 14.1 points-per-game average) and averaged 17.3 points in 180 playoff games.

Video Games Rule

Bob Jingle and I play alot of video games, and more than once over past three or so years that I have lived in Brooklyn, we have debated with other members of our circle of friends about the benefits of playing video games. (Note: I was going to link an blog entry by Mr. Jingle here, but I cannot find where he blogge about it. GOD DAMN IT.) Well, it appears that we were on to something because per the article and link below, it appears that surgeons who play video games not only get there dork in another area of their lives other than the practice of medicine, but also appear to be able to rule at surgery.

Surgeons may err less by playing video games
Three hours a week decreased mistakes by 37 percent, study finds

All those years on the couch playing Nintendo and PlayStation appear to be paying off for surgeons. Researchers found that doctors who spent at least three hours a week playing video games made about 37 percent fewer mistakes in laparoscopic surgery and performed the task 27 percent faster than their counterparts who did not play video games.

And on that note, here is a creepy picture of some old dude playing video games and smiling a little happily for my tastes. What are the odds that he molested this little kid after he got to level 10 on find Grandpa's Balls, a choose your own adventure game for Xbox 360? Creepy...

Celebrity Death Pool

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A Settlement Has Been Reached

My trial settled this morning before I started selecting a jury. This is a common occurrence, settlement right before trial, because much like poker, plaintiff's attorneys often bluff right up until the time of trial in hopes that they can squeeze more money out of the defendants. In this case, we threw in an extra $2500 on top of our previous $7500 that we had put on the case. In theory that means that the bluffing worked but in reality, the extra $2500 means very little. This is because this settlement in this case after all the fees have been paid will probably mean that the plaintiff sees less than 3000 of the actual settlement and that the plaintiff's attorney barely covers the cost of the time they put into this case. So for all that time and money, there is very little pay out and really makes you question the tactic of letting such a low value case go on for over six years as it would have been more profitable to get rid of this thing a lot earlier in process. Of course, attorneys are some of the dumbest people I know so this is not surprising in the least.

The good news is that with the case being settled, I have the next couple of days to make sure I continue to update this bad boy. I have some ideas in my head so come back here later today or tomorrow, and I should have something new posted.

Now off to write.

Tolerance

Thanks to Tim Hardaway for demonstrating that ignorance and outright stupidity is alive and well in the United States.... The following was his response to being asked by Sports radio personality, Dan LeBatard, how he would deal with having a gay teammate.

"You know, I hate gay people, so let it be known," Hardaway said. "I don't like gay people and I don't like to be around gay people. I am homophobic. I don't like it. It shouldn't be in the world or in the United States."

Hey Champ, why don't you sit the next few plays out, ok? I realize that people still think this way, and I am not so naive as to believe that this type hatred will ever be eradicated from society. However, it still shocks me when opinions like this one are voiced in such a mainstream setting without even a hint of concern or sense of responsibility as to what they are saying. Furthermore, I am not trying to say that people cannot have their own views but to rise to the level of saying I "hate" a certain group of people and then stating that they should not exist on this Earth is just plain lunacy and deserves condemnation.

Further, it's equally shameful that today after making those comments, Hardaway has of course come out, apologized, and stated, "Yes, I regret it. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said I hate gay people or anything like that that was my mistake." I love when people do use this type of nest day apology crap as if a simple apology will suddenly make us forget the comments of the day before. I cannot wait for the next step where he blames alcohol, Jesus, or the fact that he was picked on as a child as his excuse for comments and then enters rehab. I think that it is time that we stop giving athletes, celebrities, and other public figures a free pass on their comments and then almost immediate quest for reconciliation. As such, I think that Mr. Hardaway from this day forward should not be referred to as former-NBA player Tim Hardaway, but instead should be labeled with the phrases that he chose to use to discuss gay people. As a result, I present to you, "Homophobe and Hater of the Gay Community," Tim Hardaway.

Good Call

To every weather man, who told me last night that the storm would probably amount to nothing here in the City, FUCK YOU. Seriously, do you people go to school for this stuff or what? At what point did you want to include the fact that the City would get 3 inches of snow, topped off with ice, then more snow, and now more snow...(instead of reporting less than an inch with rain all day today.) Oh and thanks for telling us about the blinding sleet needles that were falling this AM. What a useless profession!!! Atleast, I got to watch one of you d-bags take a digger last night live on CBS 2 News... I hope you broke your arm...

Valentine's Day Massacre

Well, it's 11 AM, and I am glad to say that I made it to work today. I cannot begin to tell you the amount of courage that it took to get out of bed this morning, throw on those shoes, and take the old subterranean way here because if you haven't heard, New York City later this afternoon is about to get hit with a MAJOR, CATASTROPHIC snow storm... the type of storm that may cripple this thriving metropolis... with its projected 2-4 inches of possible accumulation.

Yes, you read that correct as last night every news station in New York City lead with a story about the threat of the coming major storm that at its most recent projections is going to drop 2-4 inches of snow on the City. No, this storm is not going to drop 10-12 feet like the eight days of snow did in Upstate New York nor is it going to even drop a foot. Instead, the media has invoked its Storm of the Century 24 hour coverage for something that back in the day would not even have been mentioned on an evening news broadcast, but now becomes the entire focus of the broadcast.

Sadly, this phenomena is not limited to the over reactive media of New York City as I have caught similarly over the top broadcasts while visiting the motherland of Connecticut. It wasn't always like this, however, as I remember the days when the weather was simply a two minute segment right before sports that on the very rarest of occassions would lead off the broadcast if a storm threatened to dump a significant amount of snow on the area or there was a friggin' hurricane about to hit. Needless to say, it appears that this type of shock forecasting is here to stay as weatherman and their complicit news stations are now engaged in a nightly game of one-ups-manship to see who can make the craziest predictions about the weather. This endless competition to be the first to call the end of mankind leaves the viewers to helplessly discern what actually will happen during a storm and at that same time plants the seed to watch this continuous coverage in case the worst possible outcome becomes a reality.

But fear not my readers, I will not leave you to rely on the maniacs to tell you what to expect in the next forty-eight horus. Instead, I will remain here at Rain Delay Storm Watch Headquarters for the remainder of the day and atleast until 5 PM to give you my faithful readers updates on the progress of the storm along with any new predictions I can find from the local media to better assist you with preparing for the apocalypse.

Bridge to WHAT?

Recently, I saw the preview for the new Disney-made film version of the book, Bridge to Terabithia, by Katherine Paterson. The preview appears to be heavy on teasing potential film goers with amazing images of the imaginary world of Terabithia that the two main characters, Jesse Aaron and Leslie Burke, create in the woods near their houses. (For those that want a refresher on the plot, it's here.)

Needless to say, it appears from the preview that Disney has disney'ed the shit out of this film, and by doing so, they have created a story that appears to be more about the fantasy world and less about the one thing that I remember to this day from reading this book back in elementary school... and that is, THE GIRL FRIGGIN' DIES WHEN SHE FALLS OFF THE BRIDGE, SMACKS HER HEAD, AND DROWNS... SHE DIES GOD DAMMIT... I have no memories of a fantasy world or the fun times had there. Instead all I remember is that little plot twist with that poor girl in the water drowning. I mean I played in the woods, there was water, there were rocks in the water, and there were trees over that water with the rocks... I could picture it man cause I lived it... I WAS IN THE SHIT...

And so, I don't have memories of the fantasy world that they created, which presently, sounds a lot more like a clever cover up that they invented to hide the fact that they were engaging in some weird pre-pubescent sex shit in those woods. Whatever was going on out there, I remember none of it instead I am left with a solitary vision of a floating corpse. So maybe, I will go and see Disney's new take on the book that has scarred me for these many years. And then hopefully through the magic of Disney, my memories of that fateful fall will be replaced with happier thoughts filled with images of unicorns, dragons, Goofy, Donald, and Mickey and Minnie getting it on somewhere on a rocky ledge in the kingdom of Terabithia.

A Contest Between Gentlemen

As I get older, my body is slowly but surely transformed from years and years of drinking the suds from that of a former Division I athlete to that of a coach potato. As a result, articles of clothing stop fitting as favorite t-shirts seem shorter as they try to extend over my belly edging scarily towards becoming half shirts and jeans take a little more effort to put on to fit over my giant ass and legs.

Sadly, with the weight gain of aging, the motivation to start to reverse the years of imbibing tends to be lacking as results are slow to come by since my metabolism is no longer the chipper little lad of my youth. Instead, I can no longer simply think about losing weight and do it, it actually requires work, which means I have to exercise and watch what I eat. And while, I enjoy working out, the second part of that equation is the part that I kind of have a problem with since I really enjoying drinking some beers and eating good food.

And so, drastic times call for drastic measures, and that is why today, I proposed a contest, a challenge of sorts, between myself and fellow blogger, Bob Jingle, where we will have a race to be the first one to lose twenty pounds, which would put me right at my fighting weight from my first year of law school of 190 or so. Now, the details have not really been worked out.. as we have not figured out the reward although proposals like a Luger Steak or 500 dollars have been discussed. Nor have we picked a start date or hammered out any of the rules such as a rule against starving yourself in order to win.

And so maybe, this whole thing will just end up being another Monday morning lament between Bob Jingle and I about how we hate our jobs, how fat we are, and how we cannot figure out what to do with the rest of our lives... As such, even though all of this all is very preliminary at this juncture, I will be sure to keep you posted if we get closer to this challenge becoming a reality. Further if any of you out there have any ideas on rules, rewards, or ways to make this challenge a reality, please feel free to drop a comment and let me know....

Recovering Slowly

As I get older, it becomes harder and harder to get over a hard night of drinking. I mean I am not as hungover the day after as I used to be in college or law school mainly because I no longer smoke a pack of cigarettes in addition to ingesting 10-15 beers. But still, I remain a bit off for a good day or two these days where I am just not as sharp as I am on a regular, which is not really that sharp actually pretty dull kind of like a butter knife. (I just used a butter knife reference, I think that proves my point on how retarded I am the day after a night of carousing...)

Anyway, last night's events featured a Dirty 30th Birthday for Bob Jingle's wife where the drinks were all vodka based. As a result, I am now straining to put together a coherent thought as the remaining members of the Russian Army to find their way out of my system. (What ever the fuck that means.) As such, I am left sitting here in my numbed state trying to write and then, spend the remainder of my time screaming at another brutal performance by the UConn Husky Basketball team.

(God they are pathetic! I mean how the fuck can a team play three quarters of season and still look like they have never played a game of organized basketball in their life. I think its time just to admit that the players they recruited are just not cutting it when it comes to playing anything that resembles UConn basketball. After the season, Jim Calhoun needs to just sit them down, thank them for their time, and ask them to not return next season. This not pretty folks.)

Anyway, I have 11 more minutes of suckitude to watch...

My Office Space Existence

From the movie, Office Space:

Bob Slydell: You see, what we're actually trying to do here is, we're trying to get a feel for how people spend their day at work... so, if you would, would you walk us through a typical day, for you?
Peter Gibbons: Well, I generally come in at least fifteen minutes late, ah, I use the side door - that way Lumbergh can't see me, heh heh - and, uh, after that I just sorta space out for about an hour.

Bob Porter: Da-uh? Space out?

Peter Gibbons: Yeah, I just stare at my desk; but it looks like I'm working. I do that for probably another hour after lunch, too. I'd say in a given week I probably only do about fifteen minutes of real, actual, work.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

As I sit here on this lovely February afternoon in my office sipping a Tall Boy, I have come to realize that more and more my life is slowly becoming very much like that of Peter Gibbons from the movie, Office Space filled with a lack of inspiration or motivation. As I have mentioned before, I am a trial attorney, which means that every week I basically pick a jury, open a case, try the case, close the sucker down, and wait for a verdict. If my case ends early in the week, I get a new one for the next week and start the whole process all over again. (Lather, rinse, repeat) Trials can be fun if that is what you want to do with your life, and yes there is a rush that comes with a getting a verdict but once again, that is only if this is what you want to do with your life.

For the last couple of weeks, however, I have not had a trial assigned to me since we have hit a lull in my office. As a result, I have started to find other ways to spend my time while at work such as reinvigorating this blog and surfing the web for porn. However, it has become readily apparent to me that slowly but surely whether I have a trial or not I am going to become Peter Gibbons because I just don't have the necessary desire, drive, or motivation to put any effort into this hapless job.

And I know its going this metamorphisis is going to happen because it already has started... I mean this week is a perfect example...

Monday-- Day after Super Bowl-- Called in sick.

Tuesday-- Contemplated calling in sick, but realized I had a basketball game with the office team that even so instead went to work around 10:30 when I am supposed to be there at 9. Minimal amount of work done. Considered doing more work but realized there is no point to doing any work.

Wednesday-- Arrived at work relatively early i.e. 9:30. Conducted a deposition and then took the rest of the day off to write.

Thursday-- Arrived at work a little before noon, went to lunch at 1, and failed to do a thing for the remainder of the day other than find out Anna Nicole died and then wrote about it.

Friday-- Got here around 9:40. Spent the remainder of the day surfing the web, sending links of articles to my friends, writing, and gchatting. I did do work for one hour because the big boss from Manhattan came to inspect us. After he left, I proceeded to crack a beer and write this thing.

Actually from that summary, I have a pretty easy/hooked up existence, but the problem is that I want to be challenged. I wanted to be motivated. I want to work hard. I don't want to become Peter Gibbons. This is not the life I aspired to have. I am tired of frittering it away.

I want to dance....

INFIDELS!!!

Thanks to the detective work of the my good friend Andrew of "Nobody Listens to Andrew" fame, I found out today that my old blog site, www.angryfornoparticularreason.blogspot.com, has been hijacked by spammers.

As a result, no longer do you get an error when you go there, but are instead met with a variety of spam links for the topic of "drafts sportscenter." There are ten links there that seem to run the spectrum from Sports Center highlights to debt consolidation, which actually is an ironic snapshot of my life. I feel partially responsible for the old site's fate as I never imagined that my simple change to a shorter easier-to-type name would result in such a quick demise for the my other address. Sorry old friend, I never meant for that to be your fate. And so, I promise to hunt down the bastards that did this to you, and publicly execute them on this site filming it all on a cell phone that will most likely be snuck in Savage or Bob Jingle. THEY WILL PAY... AS GOD AS MY WITNESS, THEY WILL PAY!!!

Anna Nicole Smith is Dead

And I just won my celebrity death pool....

Seriously, for a day in which I have done no work and have been questioning my future with my current employer, this little breaking news story has created quite the stir throughout my universe of gchatting friends and coworkers. I guess my take since you care is that when combine lot of pills, depression, the death of a son, which you may or may not have had a part in, and rapid weight loss/gain/loss, you are not exactly the healthiest person in the world and are probably on borrowed time. As well, you might have a little motivation to end it all in order to get away from the craziness that is your existence. And while it would have been easy to see this one coming, Anna Nicole seemed to have this crazy ability to remain alive even though she has been clearly under the influence of a veritable cocktail of narcotics for decades now.

Rest in Peace Anna... you defied the law of averages for years... you crazy stripper.